There is an elephant in the room.
What I mean is this, I feel distant from God. I don't like feeling this way at all. But as much as I try I can't seem to bridge the gap. As time goes on I feel more cold, as if my life were slowly fading away. Is there a cure for this sickness? My conscience tells me yes, repentance. This I have tried but it seems to be of no use. Does God just stay SILENT sometimes on purpose? Or is he speaking to me and I just can't hear him? I do not want to slide any farther but I can't seem to get my footing. There has been so much change in my life lately that I can hardly recognize a thing. I don't even recognize myself right now.
August 30, 2009
August 29, 2009
LADO TEFL certificate
This past friday was the final day for the TEFL certificate course I was taking. The practicum and theory are over but a sizable amount of work still remains to be done. In addition to a revision of my final lesson with assessment notes in a publishable format, I need to read 2 books, write a comprehensive final exam and complete a cultural profile for Taiwan (or whatever country I decide I want to go to). Former participants of the course said the final assigments that make up our "toolbox" could easily take a month to complete! I need to not lose any steam and keep a rigorous schedule going to get all my work done asap.
All in all, I think the course was really good. It definitely pushed me to the breaking point a couple of times, but I am so glad I didn't quit. It was something I needed to do. I think it has made me stronger and inclined me to be more proactive. Teaching is really quite rewarding when you see your students catch on to what's being taught and they get excited about learning and practicing English. I do think teaching is a good fit for me, at least with the meager 13 hours of experience I have had so far. Time might say otherwise, but only after a serious dedication to teaching for some time would I even think about turning to something else. Now the task at hand is to land that first teaching gig, wherever in the world that may be.
I've always wanted to travel extensively abroad, but now that I am facing a very good possibility of doing so I find myself holding back just a little bit. Maybe it's the uncertainty of going out into the world all by myself. I definitely always hoped I'd do some traveling once I found that special someone, but things are the way they are for a reason and I am determined to accept my circumstances as a gift. I am young, single, unattached and multilingual. It would seem that indeed the world is my oyster. Now I just need to the guts to step out on my own adventure.
All in all, I think the course was really good. It definitely pushed me to the breaking point a couple of times, but I am so glad I didn't quit. It was something I needed to do. I think it has made me stronger and inclined me to be more proactive. Teaching is really quite rewarding when you see your students catch on to what's being taught and they get excited about learning and practicing English. I do think teaching is a good fit for me, at least with the meager 13 hours of experience I have had so far. Time might say otherwise, but only after a serious dedication to teaching for some time would I even think about turning to something else. Now the task at hand is to land that first teaching gig, wherever in the world that may be.
I've always wanted to travel extensively abroad, but now that I am facing a very good possibility of doing so I find myself holding back just a little bit. Maybe it's the uncertainty of going out into the world all by myself. I definitely always hoped I'd do some traveling once I found that special someone, but things are the way they are for a reason and I am determined to accept my circumstances as a gift. I am young, single, unattached and multilingual. It would seem that indeed the world is my oyster. Now I just need to the guts to step out on my own adventure.
July 31, 2009
Whirlwind Summer
All sense of normalcy left my life after I worked my last day at my old job May 13th.
A couple days later I packed up my car and drove to Hopewell, VA to store some belongings at my grandparents and also to be closer to the Richmond airport for my trip to Venezuela. May 19th I flew out sans my granddad, as he found out the previous day he could not travel, and arrived in Barcelona, Venezuela around 7 p.m. the same day. Over the next two weeks I helped with housework such as cleaning, cooking and laundering, drove my sister to school, visited with old friends, helped my parents pack up their lives and home, attended my sister's high school graduation and a church wedding in the same night, and had a nice long, eye-opening chat with a missionary couple.
June 2nd, I traveled from Barcelona to Miami with my mom, dad and sister as we all left Venezuela for good. (My parents have finished their 20-year stint as church planters/missionaries in Venezuela and are back in the U.S. for a yearlong furlough of sorts). After arriving in Miami, we rented a car and drove up to Perry, FL to stay with my other grandparents. We spent a week there trying to relax and process our departure from Venezuela and gear up for the remainder of the summer. The day we left we traveled by car to Columbia, SC. After one night we went to Myrtle Beach. The next day we drove to Hopewell, VA. The next day, June 11th, I left my family behind and drove up to Mercersburg, PA for a friend's bachelorette party. Two days later I was a bridesmaid in the wedding for the same friend. I left the same day as the wedding and tried to drive to Blacksburg but only made it as far as Staunton, where I stayed overnight with relatives. After arriving in Blacksburg after being gone for nearly a month, I alternated my time between Blacksburg and Hopewell spending time with family but also trying to experience a bit of Blacksburg summer. In Blacksburg I tried to make it to some Gravitate events (young adults group from my church), pioneer girls summer activities and most importantly work on packing up all my things and preparing to vacate my apartment.
July 13th I finally moved out of my apartment. I spent most of the following week at the Young's home, where they very graciously let me stay in their basement and come and go as I needed. It was a huge blessing to feel so much at home and have my own space in the middle of all the other going ons. Saturday my brother got married, and oh my, what a special day!!! I spent Friday and Saturday night at a hotel with my folks and extended relatives before heading back to Hopewell, VA (my grandparents' place). Monday my parents, sister and I headed up to Burke, VA to get acquainted with my parents' new apartment and then the following day, July 21st, my sister and I took off for New York. We spent a week at my grandparents cottage getting it ready for them to move in but we also goofed off and spent some great time together reminding each other daily that we were "on vacation"! This past Tuesday, July 28th, we drove over to Massachusetts to visit cousins near Springfield. The next day we drove all the way back down to Hopewell which ended up taking over 13 hours. Arriving completely exhausted at 2:30 am we crashed in our clothes and left everything in the car.
It is now 5:36 am Friday morning and I'm awake, still unable to get my body back on a proper sleeping schedule. Maybe I should stay up all day, which they say is the way to cure jet lag.
For a quick recap, because everything I wrote above is way too long and detailed, I have traveled between all the following places in the past 2 months: Blacksburg, Hopewell, Richmond, Atlanta, Miami, Barcelona (Venezuela), Miami, Perry Fl, Columbia SC, Myrtle Beach, Hopewell, Mercersburg PA, Staunton, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Burke, Broadalbin NY, Springfield MA then Hopewell (crossing through these states at some point - Connecticut, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, & Maryland).
I think it's a bit much. Perhaps. I'm starting to feel like a rockstar! (not really).
So is that all? Am I done? Not quite. Tomorrow I'm going back up to Burke because my parents will be back from their trip to Wheaton, IL. But I'll be staying there for at least a whole month while I take my TEFL course with LADO International.
A couple days later I packed up my car and drove to Hopewell, VA to store some belongings at my grandparents and also to be closer to the Richmond airport for my trip to Venezuela. May 19th I flew out sans my granddad, as he found out the previous day he could not travel, and arrived in Barcelona, Venezuela around 7 p.m. the same day. Over the next two weeks I helped with housework such as cleaning, cooking and laundering, drove my sister to school, visited with old friends, helped my parents pack up their lives and home, attended my sister's high school graduation and a church wedding in the same night, and had a nice long, eye-opening chat with a missionary couple.
June 2nd, I traveled from Barcelona to Miami with my mom, dad and sister as we all left Venezuela for good. (My parents have finished their 20-year stint as church planters/missionaries in Venezuela and are back in the U.S. for a yearlong furlough of sorts). After arriving in Miami, we rented a car and drove up to Perry, FL to stay with my other grandparents. We spent a week there trying to relax and process our departure from Venezuela and gear up for the remainder of the summer. The day we left we traveled by car to Columbia, SC. After one night we went to Myrtle Beach. The next day we drove to Hopewell, VA. The next day, June 11th, I left my family behind and drove up to Mercersburg, PA for a friend's bachelorette party. Two days later I was a bridesmaid in the wedding for the same friend. I left the same day as the wedding and tried to drive to Blacksburg but only made it as far as Staunton, where I stayed overnight with relatives. After arriving in Blacksburg after being gone for nearly a month, I alternated my time between Blacksburg and Hopewell spending time with family but also trying to experience a bit of Blacksburg summer. In Blacksburg I tried to make it to some Gravitate events (young adults group from my church), pioneer girls summer activities and most importantly work on packing up all my things and preparing to vacate my apartment.
July 13th I finally moved out of my apartment. I spent most of the following week at the Young's home, where they very graciously let me stay in their basement and come and go as I needed. It was a huge blessing to feel so much at home and have my own space in the middle of all the other going ons. Saturday my brother got married, and oh my, what a special day!!! I spent Friday and Saturday night at a hotel with my folks and extended relatives before heading back to Hopewell, VA (my grandparents' place). Monday my parents, sister and I headed up to Burke, VA to get acquainted with my parents' new apartment and then the following day, July 21st, my sister and I took off for New York. We spent a week at my grandparents cottage getting it ready for them to move in but we also goofed off and spent some great time together reminding each other daily that we were "on vacation"! This past Tuesday, July 28th, we drove over to Massachusetts to visit cousins near Springfield. The next day we drove all the way back down to Hopewell which ended up taking over 13 hours. Arriving completely exhausted at 2:30 am we crashed in our clothes and left everything in the car.
It is now 5:36 am Friday morning and I'm awake, still unable to get my body back on a proper sleeping schedule. Maybe I should stay up all day, which they say is the way to cure jet lag.
For a quick recap, because everything I wrote above is way too long and detailed, I have traveled between all the following places in the past 2 months: Blacksburg, Hopewell, Richmond, Atlanta, Miami, Barcelona (Venezuela), Miami, Perry Fl, Columbia SC, Myrtle Beach, Hopewell, Mercersburg PA, Staunton, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Blacksburg, Hopewell, Burke, Broadalbin NY, Springfield MA then Hopewell (crossing through these states at some point - Connecticut, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, & Maryland).
I think it's a bit much. Perhaps. I'm starting to feel like a rockstar! (not really).
So is that all? Am I done? Not quite. Tomorrow I'm going back up to Burke because my parents will be back from their trip to Wheaton, IL. But I'll be staying there for at least a whole month while I take my TEFL course with LADO International.
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